Will I ever fit in anywhere?
Even in the world of disorders, I don't belong.
Too fat for anorexia, not fat enough for binge eating, don't purge enough for bulimia.
I suppose, in a way, it could be a good thing.
I can justify what I'm doing.
I don't have a problem, I've never been diagnosed.
I'd almost welcome a diagnosis.
At least then I'd know I belonged somewhere.
I certainly wouldn't be taken as seriously by a doctor as someone who had an official diagnosis.
Who knows, maybe I will go see a doctor and pour my heart out and be completely brutally honest...
I doubt it.
They wouldn't take me seriously.
I have this voice in my head that tells me
"Hey, you don't have a problem.
You haven't been diagnosed.
Just keep going.
Maybe you'll find where you belong someday."
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