Being Single

You know how everyone says when you're single life is great?
You can do whatever you want and not have to answer to anyone?
You know how they say being single is better than being in a relationship?
Well, they're fucking wrong.
Don't get me wrong, being single has it's advantages.
Yes, it's true I don't have to answer to anyone, but even when I'm with someone, I do whatever the fuck I want.
However, it's not all it's cracked up to be.
When you're with someone, you always have someone to turn to if you need them.
Maybe I should just become a lesbian. Hehe.
They seem to have better luck finding dates than me.
I don't need a man, but it would be nice to have one around if I needed one.
You know what?
Fuck it.

Tattoos and Reinventions

I finally got my tattoo.
I was waiting until I reached my GW, but I realised if I did that, I'd be waiting for a long time, and by that time I might have talked myself out of it.
This will also be even more incentive to make myself work harder.
I am now vegetarian, and so far it's working well for me.
With my hair being dark, the style it's cut in, and my tattoo, Samantha said I look like Joan Jett.

I wouldn't mind if it were true, because Joan Jett is so pretty and fucking badass.
Samantha said I also have a very "Fuck the world. If you don't like me, shut the fuck up because I don't give a damn" attitude, which made her think of Joan Jett.
Anyway, Sunday is Easter, and go fucking figure-I have to work.
I was supposed to be off, but Amber asked if I would cover her shift.
I'll be making double money, so I'm not complaining much.
Well, I guess that's all I have time to write now.


^^
My tattoo.

Nails and Tiredness

It never fails. When my nails are wet, something itches. Right now it's my nose. Every. Fucking. Time. I haven't decided if I'm going to paint them just red or if I want to do red with black stripes. Right now, I'm listening to Joan Jett and the Blackhearts. I'm so freaking tired it isn't even funny. I worked from 12:00-19:15 tonight, and my feet hurt quite a bit.

I'm also watching Toy Story, and I'm going to go to bed pretty soon, since I have to be at work tomorrow as well. I have to let my nails dry, take my makeup off (scary thought, I know) and then get ready for bed. I'm also looking at some boots I want to buy and I will when I get the money, picture will be posted. Mara has the same pair, and I love them!

New haircut

I cut my hair today. It's a Joan Jett haircut, and I absolutely love it. I'm trying to decide what I should eat for dinner (if anything) and I think I may just go to sleep. I'm really tired and I've been sleeping downstairs to keep myself from consuming the box of sleeping tablets I have in my room. Anyway, since I don't have my camera with me right now, here's a picture of my haircut, from the original source, Joan Jett.

Truth and Paper Airplane

Well, I went to work on Saturday, and for some reason, everyone in the town I work in decided they wanted to eat at Subway. So, we were swamped. Anyway, I worked my arse off, and as I was getting a drink after one of our big rushes, one of the guys I work with pulled me in one of the back rooms (not what you're thinking, I swear).

He told me that one of the women (old enough to be my mother) had been saying things about me behind my back and just wanted to let me know. It really pissed me off, not to mention I'd already been stressed because we were so busy. So, a little later he asked if I was okay and (like a fucking idiot) I said "Yeah. I'm fine. And after I get home and find a knife I'll be even better." I didn't expect him to hear anything other than the "I'm fine" bit, so when he came up to me and started trying to convince me not to cut anymore, I was a bit confused.

He's more of the goofing off, teasing type, so to have him be serious, and especially toward me was a bit unnerving. He said he would be pissed at me if I did go home and cut. He asked me what was wrong and why I was going to cut. I replied that I didn't know. The only time I've ever felt obligated to tell someone the truth about it is if I was talking to my cousin or my best friend, or the guys I've dated. So why do I feel like I owe him the truth?

Anyway, the new Alison Krauss and Union Station (AKUS) album Paper Airplane comes out tomorrow. I've been waiting for this for a month and I'm so excited. The title track is hauntingly beautiful and I have high expectations for the rest of the CD.

"Every silver lining always seems to have a cloud that comes my way. Love is hard to measure hidden in the rain, and that's why you'll find me here all alone and still wondering why, waiting inside for the cold to get colder. And here where it's clear that I've wasted my time, hoping to fly 'cause it's almost over now.

People come together, people go their own way. Love conquers few. And, I'll do whatever, I'll say what I need to say, just not for you. How many days should I smile with a frown, 'cause you're not around with the sun on your shoulders? And how many nights must I wake up alone and know in my soul that it's almost over now?"--Alison Krauss and Union Station, "Paper Airplane"

Clocks

The clocks are ticking
The face that does not see
The hands that do not hold
Precious moments passing by silently
The end is drawing near
The breath slows
The eyes close
The hands fall lifelessly
The face that does not see
The hands that do not hold
Time waits for no one
The clocks are ticking


Yes, that is a poem written by yours truly. Do not ask why, it just fell from my pen one night. Time seems to lurch to a stop, and then when you least expect it, take flight like a white winged dove fleeing for her life. And we are powerless to stop it. The world turns, the dawn rises like thunder, the night sweeps in like the tide. I continue to build the walls. No one will break them this time. I will not let myself become as vulnerable as I once was. Never again.

And I don't think I can handle this at all. If you ever did believe for my sake...