Of Trouble In Shangri-La

With the way the media and most people glamourise eating disorders, you would think it is paradise.
You would be wrong.

What if I told you that you would spend every second, every minute, every hour thinking about food and how to avoid it?
What if I told you that you'd be so scared of eating that the mere thought of food would make you break down?
What if I told you that soon you'll be feeling weak and dizzy, nearly passing out every time you move?
What if I told you that your hair will break, your nails will turn blue, and for some women, you will possibly become infertile due to loss of a menstrual cycle?
What if I told you that you will lose your friends, your family, your boyfriend/girlfriend, the trust of everyone you love?
What if I told you that people will treat you as though you're made of glass?
What if I told you that everyone will whisper behind your back, but only a few will have the nerve to face you?
What if I told you that you'll be so cold that you'll be wearing heavy sweaters even in the warmest weather?
What if I told you that you'll most likely hate yourself so much that you want to end everything?
What if I told you that it's almost impossible to escape?

Would you still want to be like me?
Would you still want this?

There's trouble in Shangri-La....

This life is not as glamourous as people make it out to be.
Every day is a struggle.
Some days I want it all to stop.
The fear.
The calorie-counting.
The purging.
The cutting.
Life.

God, help me. If I ever needed You, it's definitely now.
Don't leave me.
My hands are searching for You.
My arms are outstretched towards You.
Help me.
Save me.
Please?